devotional – The Notebook Collector

QUICKY NOTES …

“Be quick to listen”; & take down notes –

Praise the Lord, O my soul;

All my inmost being praise His holy name. (Psalm 103: 1)

Last November I got really sick. A viral illness had some of my body organs greatly affected.

Brain infection; no kidding. To be medically sound, “cerebral edema”. Latest and final diagnosis is “Reye’s Syndrome”. How I acquired this, was a long story. But to pin down what concerns me really is that the sickness got me struggling for almost a month…and would soon left me with decreased “normal” activities.

But now, I just praise the Lord in every moment. He is my constant healer. Each day that would come is when I could witness how I can be much better. I rarely catch physical illness, that, with my current journey recovering my mental health had been the one tough battle so far. So, this experience brought me to a different level of trust and seeking the Lord; and this was why I am sharing this note. 😊

Although, time leads to healing, still, it brings moments of doubts and frustrations.

I still feel weak and bouts of headaches and brain fogs impede the things I need and normally do. A simple movement could spark a sting inside my head. The pain still lingers. And because it occurs internally, it’s hard to tell.

Times like this, discouragement easily trip me off. Praying, hoping, whispering on my own, that I wish I could move better. Think clearer, just be better. Hoping healing would come as quickly as right now.

The shift in my mood and attitude affects me badly.

At this moment, as I were desperate for help, the Lord graciously led me to Him. I had nowhere else to go.

Psalm 103: 1 begins, “all my inmost being, praise His holy name!” A shift, not only in my mind but also in my emotions, came as swift as a gentle morning breeze. It is the Father gently and graciously showing Himself.

“His name is holy.” The words moved me and cleared specks in my heart. My negative reactions to my condition would not allow me to see this character of the Lord. Whenever we feel bad it is a stretch in our inner emotional muscles to extend grace and patience especially to ourselves. We see our situation and we set aside the Lord, failing to see who He can be in our midst.

Finally learning one of His precepts, I came to realize, that I don’t have anything to bring. If I find myself in my weakest, “all my inmost being would praise…” My frustrated whining turned into praise.

I praise. I would thank and be at peace for no other reason; the reason is Christ, for He is Lord. He is Holy; for who He is. Not for what I am being.

And now, I came to this revelation; a change of heart, and of thoughts: my being’s only role is to praise, and cling on to who God is. If I have sickness, illness, adversaries, it is God’s role to heal, to help, to show grace, to show He is Holy; and that no forms of evil, attitude or mindset, could stand Him. My role is recognize my iniquities and turn and cling close beside Him. I need Him.

… who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,

Who redeems you from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion…

…satisfies you with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

The Holy one, forgives and abounds in love. Holiness. His holiness can only grant those who fear and turn to Him a crown. A treasure we keep, as a symbol worn showing we have ownership of His love. He extends compassion. Even after we falter and have our shortcomings revealed before Him, we have His love, because He is holy.

The truth, it is still going to be hard to praise and trust the Lord in my present sickness. I could not really do it myself. From time to time I would still catch myself sulking in harmful thoughts about my situation. And the Lord knows this too. That is why it is important to seek His character, His heart, first. So we know that the One we cling to, is worth our confidence; trust.

God’s reaction towards us reflect His character. He may condem, but it is not who He is. He can point out our mistakes and punish but He chose many times to show goodness and give what would satisfy His children; setting aside His wrath. Only a Holy One can do that.🙂

Hi this is Introverted Pyralid! Welcome to my first Quicky Notes!

QUICKY NOTES is a collection of devotional notes dedicated to our Eternal Dad. Lately, life has not been kind. Troubles seemed endless. Many times I feel it’s hard to hear God. But we know that He is faithful. So when His word comes in times of devotion, I would not want to miss His voice. I need to be “quick to listen”, and now that my illness had troubled my ability to remember, I have to take down notes. 🙂 So, let’s not be discouraged, when it’s time for God to speak, in the midst of our troubles, “be quick to listen”; then take down notes.

5…4…

The hand motioned two dots closer before it hits number “12”. On its opposite end, the shorter hand hangs motionless.

3…2…1… I counted. It says “6” on the clock by the wall inside the house. Outside, rippling silhouettes of leaves and twigs drew on the bluish-black, almost gray sky, but with streaks of indigo.

It was getting dark. It has been in a very long time since I saw these patterns outlined the horizons. The sky has been pouring for weeks; morning ’til evening. It was non-stop. But tonight, it’s a rain-less night.

The evening closed in and then suddenly, the neighborhood’s power got cut. Before I could complain that I’ll be spending time with the dark, it’s the rain-less night that got my attention.

With the absence of lights gleaming at the stark community, darkness blanketed my view. There’s only the stillness and silence, which gave clarity of a rain-less night; And the finally clear evening is a night to thank for.

Weeks earlier, I have been praying for the stealth winds to subside and the pouring to stop. I missed the sun.

I missed the warmth and working under the sun. With no worrying on how to stay dry and continue the task needs to be done for the day.I counted not only seconds, hours, but days. It was raining for almost a month.

Though I know I have no total control, I prayed for a little sun…

Still, not a streak nor a dot peaked through the pouring clouds. I missed the moments when it was a walk in a sunshine and it seemed God answers every prayer; even those which are trivial like cancelling the rain when you need to get out or when you forget to bring an umbrella.

Then God answered this silly prayer, but in a rather twisted way. His way.

God did not give me the sun, but He sure stopped the rain. With that I knew the One who hears is teaching me something. The rain-less night, is a night for a lesson learned.

Have you ever had those times when you get prayers unanswered. Questions remained and your view of a situation is just cloudy. Disappointments were unavoidable; frustrations after frustrations. Troubles seemed non-stop. We doubted if God really hears. We doubted if we had the right kind of faith too.

We expect God to answer in a certain, more bearable way: our way. We ask, “God, just a little sun,”…”Lord just a little help… if not make this problem go away,”…”I’m not asking for a miracle, God, just a small dot of hope…” We ask, “Why?”… “Lord, why not?”

When the rains in life are relentless, it is the best season our prayers be restless. “Pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ. (1 Thes. 5 17-18).” Faith and obedience in God is not by how fast we get answers, or be blessed by how we want to experience blessings. God is never dependent on people’s choices. He still and does answer prayers, it is just not in a way we understand.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts

Isaiah 55:8-9 (ESV)

God may not always stop the rain during the day when we need it. Sometimes He needs us to wait for the night, to wait and hope in the night.

Pray.Trust. Wait. — *Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. – Psalm 27:14*

It is dark. But it is in darkness where He wants to show certain patterns revealing His

ways, which He can not make us see during the day, when there’s too much light blocking our sight.

When things seems to go our way, and prayers get answered immediately we tend to rely on our own efforts in knowing God. Thinking we must have been doing what is right. It would be impossible for God to punish ’cause we read the Bible, we serve, we had finally achieved being perfect servants. We think, “God can not withhold me His blessings, I’m giving glory to Him.” We only see things our way, in our own limited understanding of what God seeks in a person’s character and faith.

In the night, when we cannot see, we learn to depend on a single source of light. We can’t trust on our own capacity anymore. When we cannot see troubles in life end, and we cannot get answers clearly anymore, the night teaches us to wait, to expect for day to come.

We rest in the night and hope in the Lord. He is teaching us patience in times we are uncertain.

We can only trust in the One in control when we feel frustrated and nothing we see happening swerves our troubles and pain. We tried to drive our own way, or even please God just to receive what we know we deserve. We manipulate faith by following “christianized” self-help strategies from books, wisdom from famous authors-pastors, trainings, workshops, etc. We do good and we create a walk-in-a-sunshine lifestyle. But self-efforts in trying to be right in the Lord’s sight leads us to meeting our own desires and not His. The night teaches us to open our eyes and see things wider; deeper if not clear as the day.

Trust and confidence in God is alone dependent on Him, on His character and wisdom.

He is an all-knowing parent, He patiently reminds us in times of uncertainty that we can not do things our own, but He is here with us. He is gently guiding us instructions (the Bible), not only for us to follow but also to know what He promises. Prayer is our basic strategy God taught us to face life’s storms and aftermaths. Prayer is God’s way not only for us to seek answers but also seek the One who gives answers. We search God’s heart, His voice, His character, His help.

2Sa22.31 — FEATURED PHOTO FROM THE INTERNET

He is a friend who listens in the silence of hearts and desires a close walk with us in both still and stormy weather.

When prayers seemed unanswered, trust God, His Word through Jesus. He works with perfect understanding of seasons. His hand is always in motion, even if slow; He is making plans in His perfect time according to His relentless love for us.